Argh, what a gut-filling journey we’ve had. Our map directed us north from the Caribbean into the Mexican Gulf to the Port of New Orleans. From there we eased into the Mississippi’s fresh water until we reached the Ohio’s mouth. Just up that river we set our anchor and slipped ashore. Some call me Blue Beard Ben, the Scourge of the Seven Seas, and my mate is a scurvy dog named Captain Trey Doubloons. We heard tales that a bountiful fill of saccharine treasures were ripe for the taking from every doorway of this port. Well, shiver me timbers, that story’s too good to be true. Trey packed his sword and I brought me cutlass, and together we relieved the townies of their sweet booty.
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